The vast majority of employees are dissatisfied with their salaries. But only a few of them dare to ask their boss for a raise. Others say that it’s too risky and they would rather try live betting or choose another option for an extra income. Let’s find out the reasons that prevent people from starting a conversation with their manager about a salary increase, and tell you how to overcome the psychological barrier.
An Employee Doesn’t See the Connection Between Their Work and the Company’s Income
If we distribute the roles within the company according to the psychological state of the individual, some employees take the position of a child and put the employer in the position of a parent or an adult. Such an employee unconsciously expects the boss to be responsible for them, just as an adult is responsible for a child. This view extends to the amount of salary.
An employee in the role of a child doesn’t realize their value, doesn’t see the connection between their actions and the business result, and doesn’t take responsibility for decisions related to their career and income level.
In order for an employee to move from a child’s position to an “adult” position, a person needs to realize that a child is given money by their parents, while adults earn it themselves. They need to take responsibility for their income, rather than expecting their boss to do it for them.
Moreover, you need to clearly understand the relationship between your contribution and the results of the project, the team, and the company. Try to calculate how much you are contributing to the enterprise.
Sometimes a job isn’t directly related to income, but indirectly, it still helps the company earn money. For example, a foreman trains junior colleagues and passes on professional experience to them; an administrator maintains a high level of customer service, an HR manager has a positive effect on the psychological climate in the team and controls discipline in the office. Build logical chains that will help establish the relationship between your labor and the company’s income.
A Specialist Is Hindered By Psychological Barriers
Here are the most common fears:
- An employee assumes that when asked for a salary increase, the boss will say, “If you are not satisfied with the salary, quit and look for a bigger job.”
- After the supposed raise, the woman will start earning more than her husband. She is afraid that financial success will upset the man, develop a complex in him, and lead to the breakup of the relationship.
To combat your fears, use one of the techniques.
The method of the empty chair. The technique is an imaginary dialog and helps to solve internal problems. Sit on a chair, and put an empty chair in front of you. Imagine that on it sits the manager with whom you want to discuss the terms of the contract. First, say your part of the dialog, then move to the seat of the manager and say his part. Try to have a discussion, taking turns in different roles. Once you are in the manager’s role, you will be able to see what your request and the arguments in its defense look like. It will become obvious where you are not confident enough, what arguments do not stand up to criticism. The exercise helps you look at the problem from the outside and better prepare for the upcoming meeting.
Neuro linguistic programming. With its help, you can eliminate psychological barriers and create the necessary mood for future conversations. Our brains don’t separate reality and fiction, so you need to program yourself for success. For three weeks, every day for 10-15 minutes, imagine a conversation with your manager in a positive way: you speak confidently, clearly assert your interests, defend the results of your labor, and argue the need for a salary increase. Over time, your inner feelings and your body will respond to the imaginary picture. And when the conversation actually takes place, you will behave as you have programmed: your posture will be confident and relaxed, and your speech will be clear and loud. The manager subconsciously sees your confidence and is more likely to agree to the request.
Secondary Benefit
An employee sabotages a conversation with a supervisor because of a secondary benefit. For example, they don’t want some work missteps to become known to the supervisor. The employee believes that as long as he doesn’t start a conversation about a pay raise, the failures and shortcomings will remain hidden.
To deal with the problem, it’s important to realize why you’re putting off the conversation about a pay raise. You can do this by analyzing. Divide the sheet into two columns and list:
- On the left, the reasons that are pushing you to talk about a raise.
- On the right, the reasons why you’re putting off the conversation.
Most likely, in the right column, there will be reasons that relate to secondary benefits, in addition to fears and concerns. Consider what’s best: reorganize your workflow to avoid making mistakes, or leave it as is. No matter what you choose, making a conscious choice will boost your confidence and relieve stress.
Impostor Syndrome
An employee may do an excellent job but remain insecure about their professional qualities. They put their colleagues’ accomplishments ahead of their own and believe they are undeservedly ranked. This irrational belief is called “imposter syndrome” in psychology. A person with impostor syndrome feels like they are out of place, about to be exposed and treated badly.
To overcome the feeling of impostor syndrome, it’s important to notice and recognize your accomplishments as often as possible. Gather together all the awards, commendations, recommendations, and feedback about your work. Keep them in plain sight so you can learn to recognize your own accomplishments.
You can analyze your work. To do this, take a piece of paper and write down your work tasks, professional skills, and personal qualities. You will be able to see the bigger picture and notice the value you represent as a professional. This will help you not feel like an imposter and boost your self-confidence.
Societal Attitudes
Generally accepted attitudes related to work and money do not always have a positive impact on the development of professional identity. For example, a company encourages workaholism and values employees who work overtime, always agree to substitute for a colleague, and are willing to work without vacations and days off.
This doesn’t mean that the prosperity of the business depends entirely on such workers. Rather, it’s a form of self-aggressive behavior, an activity in which a person does something harmful to themselves, but it’s encouraged in society.
You need to free yourself from public opinion and accept a situation that meets your inner values, even if it leads to the judgment of others. This is the price of adult choice — you are responsible only for yourself and not for other adults.